Still Grieving the 49ers Super Bowl Loss Smorgasbord
*Before we start, how about that Kate Upton, going back-to-back on the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition cover. Dear Lord in Heaven, I can’t describe that cover photo without breaking the 3rd Commandment.
*Word on the street is Upton’s dating Detroit Tigers fireballer, Justin Verlander. Sure his team just lost the World Series, but Verlander’s the best pitcher in baseball and if that wasn’t good enough, he gets to go home to the two-time, defending, back-to-back, SI cover model. I want his life. Some guys just have all the luck, don’t they?
*In December 2011 the San Francisco Giants traded away Andres Torres and Ramon Ramirez for Angel Pagan. This offseason both Torres and Ramirez re-signed with the team. So we essentially traded Andres Torres and Ramon Ramirez for Angel Pagan…Andres Torres and Ramon Ramirez. Brian Sabean is a genius.
*Ramirez re-signing means that all 40 roster spots for the Giants are filled. Also, the Giants just signed Sergio Romo to a two-year/$9M deal. It’s looking more and more like Brian Wilson and his beard are headed out of San Francisco.
*We’re less than three months away from Floyd Mayweather’s May 4th bout, only Mayweather doesn’t have an opponent yet. Rumors are circulating that Money May will fight Devon Alexander. Don’t worry, The ‘Bord’s never heard of him either.
*Just Googled Alexander. He’s a 26-year old Southpaw from St. Louis whose nickname is “The Great.” (Real original, Dev. Wait, is it Devon ‘The Great’ Alexander or Devon Alexander ‘The Great?’ Cuz the first one wouldn’t make sense. Are fighters allowed to have their nicknames come AFTER their last name? Isn’t it supposed to come either before or after the first name? We need a ruling on this, I’m confused. My head hurts.) He’s the reigning IBF welterweight champ with a 24-1 record. He’s got notable wins over DeMarcus Corley, Lucas Matthysse and Marcos Maidana. His only loss? Timothy Bradley.
*After Jose Aldo defeated former lightweight champ, Frankie Edgar, to defend his UFC featherweight strap at UFC 156, president Dana White said he got a text message from lightweight contender, Anthony Pettis, saying he wanted to move down from 155 pounds to 145 to challenge Aldo. It’s happening. The fight is slated for August 3rd. While I’m excited to see Aldo, one of the best pound-for-pound fighters in the sport, keep taking on these top challengers from 155, how bad is the 145-lb division that these guys are dropping down and getting immediate title shots? The three lower weight classes, featherweight, bantamweight (135-lb) and flyweight (125-lb) produce exciting and fast-paced matches where if you blink, you’ll miss something, but the divisions are shallower than a mosquito’s vagina. The UFC needs to bolster the credibility of these divisions, and fast.
*Put me in the camp of people who think that the new Warriors’ jerseys are one of the biggest atrocities known to man. They’re street-light yellow with pinstripes only on the shorts. Bjork and her swan dress don’t even think it’s fashionable. Craig Sager wouldn’t even wear it. They’re worse than PAL jerseys, I know this because I played PAL. When we played PAL in the 7th grade we wished we could rock cool, tank top jerseys like the pros. I wish I could go back in time and tell 13 year-old Anthony that one day he’d be able to wear a jersey just like the Dubs.
*I need to vent more about these jerseys. They look like soccer jerseys. They look like men’s volleyball jerseys. They look like what NBA officials wear. They’re absolutely, horrendously, gawd-awful. 2012-13 is the best start the Warriors have had in a season in 18 years and then they go and break out these Bush League duds.
*Remember a few weeks ago when we thought we might be entering a golden era of Bay Area sports? The Giants have won two of the last three World Series, the A’s are the defending AL West division champs, the Warriors are headed for the playoffs and have their first All-Star since Latrell Sprewell, the Sharks started the season 7-0-0, Stanford won the Rose bowl for the first time since my Dad was 11, San Jose State finished the season ranked in the Top 25 for the first time ever, and the 49ers were back in the Super Bowl? Well, since the 49ers (allegedly) lost Super Bowl XLVII, the Warriors have lost a season-high five in a row, the Sharks have dropped six straight, and I cry myself to sleep every night damning Jacoby Jones’s name.
I hate everybody. Happy Lenten season everybody